` Theologically incorrect — imaginary family values

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“Shall we accept pleasure from God, and not accept pain?” —Job 2:10

A Jew, a Christian, and an atheist on my blogroll have all grumbled about how the press throws around terms like “miracle” and “prayers answered” to describe good news, but avoids such language to describe bad news. On the one hand, these reporters and headline-writers clearly endorse the idea that our mundane lives are influenced by divine force. On the other hand, they don’t acknowledge that a single divine force is responsible for everything in our mundane lives, the sweet and the sour.

If our newspapers are going to be written by polytheists, the least they can do is be straightforward about it. I would kvell to open up the Boston Globe and see headlines like these:

  • Nike Scorns Red Sox
  • Dionysus Kills MIT Freshman
  • Int’l Math Test: Athena Still Favors Japan
  • For Years, Aphrodite Shielded Abusive Husband
  • CO2 Levels Higher; Apollo Fiercer
  • New Quebec Autonomy Vote: Will Toutatis Prevail?

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